Words of Wisdom

Just a quick one to tell those of you with a twisted sense of humor, and those of you NOT easily offended by cursing and all things crude, about a hilarious guy on Twitter.

This guy: $#@% My Dad Says

These damn tweets had me laughing like a fool.

Nuggets of wisdom like:

"Pressure? Get married when you want. Your wedding's just one more day in my life I can't wear sweat pants."

"I just want silence. Jesus, it doesn't mean I don't like you. It just means right now, I like silence more."

"Everybody's broke, so here's the rule for Christmas this year; if you still **** your pants, you get a present. Otherwise tough ****."

"A mule kicked Uncle Bob once. Broke his ribs. He punched it in the face.. My point? You have an ingrown ****ing toenail. Stop bitching."