Revenge of the Slip 'n Slide

Instead of working all day yesterday I decide to allow myself some fun. This consisted of heading to a small cookout. Nothing fancy, just some food and beer. Oh yeah, and a Slip 'n Slide. My nephew was the only child there, but I knew right away that there would be nothing stopping us adults from using it as well. After all, if it was tons of fun as a kid, it must still be fun as an adult, right?

Look at it. It looks innocent enough:

Now consider the events that followed:

1st attempt: It was positioned on an incline making it impossible for the built-in sprinklers to wet the top. I run, try to slide, fall hard and stop dead in my tracks. Everyone laughs. I laugh. No harm done. We'll just use the hosepipe to wet the top next time.

2nd attempt: Hosepipe did the trick. As soon as my feet hit the slippery surface they come flying out from under me. My rotund butt hits first, followed by my head smacking the ground with a loud thump. I'm seeing stars, but am determined to get up quickly and not act as if I am dying. I'm positive I have a concussion so I quickly retreat to my folding chair to regroup.

3rd attempt: Never one to give up, I put a motorcycle helmet on and decide to give it another go. I go for the side slide to protect my noggin. I slide down relatively gracefully, get to my knees, and then throw two fists in the air to signal that I have defeated the Slip 'n Slide! Yay me!

4th attempt: With the 3rd attempt being a success, I decide to keep my helmet on and go again. Slide how now been covered with liquid dish soap. Yippee! I'll go even faster. I decide to go for the side slide again. As soon as I hit plastic - feet fly out and I come crashing down on my hip. Yes, I slide on down, but there is no victory celebration. Again, I retreat. This time admitting total defeat.

Today I feel as if I was run over by a herd of cattle. Stiff neck, swollen hip, headache, you name it. Moral of the story. Some of the things that were fun at 10 years old are not all that fun once you hit your 40's. Next time I will suggest a rousing game of Uno instead.