Happy Halloween

I love Halloween. Always have. Maybe it's because I have a fascination with the paranormal, or maybe it's because I like candy. Either way, I consider it fun.

When I was a kid I lived in the best Trick or Treating neighborhood ever. Eighty or so houses in a secluded subdivision. Every house contained at least two kids. Back then everything was safe. We didn't need parents to walk us around. I, being the oldest, took my three younger brothers and sister and hit the streets. Once around the subdivision was enough to supply you with candy for a week, but if you were feeling particularly greedy, you could always go again. After seeing hundreds of costumes, parents no longer knew Frankenstein from the Wolfman, and therefore you wouldn't be busted with the, "Haven't you been here already tonight?"

When I got too old to Trick or Treat, I got my kicks from being the one to hand out the candy. Of course once the teen years hit, it was all about getting into trouble. After that I had kids on my own, and the fun came from taking them out. Now they are way to old to Trick or Treat (currently in the teen, get in trouble phase).

Where does that leave me now?

I watch as many Halloween movies as I can cram into thirty days. This year I do believe I have beat my personal best. I've seen every version of Friday the 13th, every version of Halloween, and just about any other horror movie you can imagine. Not to mention countless hours of paranormal shows galore. My better half is sick of them, but has been extremely patient. She's good like that.

Our pumpkin is carved, and looks great. Tonight we will hand out candy, watch movies, and try to keep my kids out of trouble. It's certainly not the good times of the old days, but when you get older you need to make your own fun, and that's just what I'm doing this Halloween.

Halloween III - Season of the Witch

I was excited that AMC's Fright Fest was showing volumes 1-5 of the Halloween movies this week. I wondered if that was really going to include Halloween III, and then was disappointed to find out that indeed this gem was going to be shown.

In case you haven't had the honor of watching it, let me just save you the trouble of trying to choke yourself unconscious and tell you know that this is the WORST HORROR MOVIE OF ALL TIME.

It would probably be enough to just tell you that Michael Myers isn't even in this movie. Well, with the exception of a few seconds where some guys in a bar are watching the real Halloween movie on television. How do you make millions of dollars off of Halloween I & II, knowing full well that Michael Myers is the main attraction, and then follow it up with a sequel that doesn't even include him?!? It boggles the mind.

This is the actual Halloween III bad guy...

Pretty scary guy, right? Wrong. Really, Grandpa? This master of fright owns a company call Silver Shamrock that makes Halloween masks. When kids wear these masks on Halloween night and are exposed to a super annoying horrible music and video combo on TV, they turn into puddles of green ooze.

Of course there has to be someone to stop this sinister plot. Enter Chester the Molester and his Ho...

While he is somewhat concerned about his kids putting on the mask and turning to jello, he is WAY more concerned about getting in the pants of the young, hot thang by his side. Never mind the fact that she is young enough to be his daughter. Does he score? Hell yes. Where is his wife? Home watching the kids of course.


And just how are the kids doing?

"Holy s$#@! Get this freakin' thing off my head. I'm suffocating here! Where is Dad when I need him? Better not be with that skank again! Neeeed....Air....."


Of course Chester and his Ho drop some quarters (or something else metallic and cylindrical) on the head of the bad guys, and save the day...

When it ends you are left sitting there stunned that you made it through the whole movie. I, however, just crawled to the nearest corner and wept.

Slow Down, October!

I find it hard to believe that October is almost over. I love October as it is filled with football, horror movies, and haunted houses. I don't want it to end. On the bright side, November is even more fun, with birthdays, football, and Thanksgiving.

We still have to go to Sloss Furnace, and to see Paranormal Activity 2. I've been waiting for my brother to arrive in town to do these things. He's here now, so yay! I'm thrilled he was able to find work here. Since he lives in New York, the capital for performers, I never suspected that he would be back. He will be working until Christmas at the Alabama Shakespeare Festival.

Weekend full of football planned. Auburn vs LSU, followed by Alabama vs Tennessee. Tomorrow, fantasy football. I have scratched and clawed my way back, and am tied for first in my division. Before I get down to it, I need to stop blogging and go grocery shopping. Not my favorite task, so I better get on with it.

Wrong Answer

Did Alabama beat South Carolina? Yes. Wrong answer! Oh well, I guess it's true that "you can't win 'em all" and after two and a half seasons of not losing a game, it's an easier pill to swallow.

As is typical of Fall, we have been slammed. Football, birthdays, job, side jobs, holidays, kids. My youngest brother arrives next week and will be here through Christmas. Mrs. Leslie and I are planning a trip to Saint Augustine, Florida for Thanksgiving with her family. Her son and brother will be arriving here from Washington and Vermont a few days beforehand, and we will drive down together.

I have no new movies to talk about, as I have watched nothing but ghost shows since October 1st. Someone is sick of them, but someone also knows how I love them and tolerates my horror obsession. My favorite show, Ghost Hunters, filmed an episode at Sloss Furnaces here in Birmingham that I think airs November 17th. We too will be at Sloss soon for this: Sloss Fright Furnace  Can't wait!

Alabama 31, Florida 6

Soon it will be Saturday again, and I haven't even mentioned the 31-6 throttling that Alabama put on Florida. I'll admit it, heading into game time I could barely touch our game day food. It was all I could do to get a beer in to calm my nerves. But a few minutes in, Bama had the lead and never looked back. A good time was had by all.

This week we move on in our unholy stretch of tough opponents, and take on South Carolina. New week, new worries...hope it is the same good team we have seen thus far.

I've been busy turning out articles lately. I resent the day job for taking time away from my writing, but don't yet have the courage to jump ship because the writing doesn't pay enough. It's a double edge sword. If I quit working and only write it might pay enough, but I can't be certain of that. If I keep working and don't take the leap, then I may never know.

Chili cooking. Ghost Hunters new episode later. Mrs. Leslie giving me goo-goo eyes. My man-child cleaned the kitchen. Girl child avoided trouble today. Life is good.